little world changers

sunday at church our pastor gave a really great sermon about the influence a mother has in her children's lives.

i was all over that sermon.
so much so that i just listened to it again.

it's so jam packed with amazing that the link to it is included at the end of this blog. so when you're done reading this, go listen.

the part that really made me think was when he said mothers are building up world changers. that as a mother, i've been called by God to raise up my tiny humans to make a difference.

talk about some serious pressure.
but when i really think about it, it's a beautiful pressure to be put on my shoulders.

from the day i birth my babies to the day they turn eighteen, i have the ability to build them up, or tear them down. i'm in the position to speak life to them, or to constantly yell. i have the ability to instill in them Godly values, or let the world have it's way with them.

and it might not be the popular way.
but.
i'm deciding now, that the influence i'll have on my children will be to raise them up in the name of Jesus to love the Lord and be world changers. to see the world differently. to love people well. and to grow in God's grace.

the closer we get to meeting our little nugget the more i realize that parenting isn't just making sure they eat and sleep. it isn't just making sure they get to baseball practice on time, or make sure they have a present for that birthday party. it isn't hounding them until they make all A's in school.

parenting is a chance to raise up Godly men and women. it's a chance to change future generations.

"mothers are called through their sons and daughters to change the course of history and to bring forth world changers."

there's so much about parenting that i don't have a clue about.
but what i do know, is that i have influence over my children.

the way i choose to live my life, will affect theirs.
they way i choose to use my words, will affect the way they use theirs.
the way i choose to handle tough situations, will affect the way they handle theirs.

i'm going to let my life be a life that's worth looking up to. and not in a conceded way.
but i want my children to remember me as being a Godly woman.

i want them to remember that i didn't yell and scream at them when they did something wrong.
i want them to remember that i parented well, without putting fear in them.
i want them to remember that at times i was wrong, and i admitted it.
i want them to remember that i loved well, in turn making them love well.

"a mother holds a significant amount of influence in the way she speaks, and the way she lives her life."

raising a child can't be easy. hello, i was one once, and i promise you i was not an easy child to raise. but. i hear it can be the most rewarding thing on the planet.
and so no, i don't want to mess this up.
because it's a short window that i have with my babies until they all grow up.
and for those short eighteen years i want to make sure i point them to Jesus in everything i do.

we live in a very fast paced, technologically driven world. which can be wonderful at times, but also scares the crap out of me when it comes to my children. 

sonny and i joke all the time that we're going to be the worlds meanest parents because of how little technology our kids will have. it's something we've decided on now. so that it doesn't become a problem. i also just read an article, ok a bunch of articles, on how children really shouldn't watch tv before their two. and that kids who watch the average amount of tv kids are watching these days (before the age of 5) create problems down the road. but did we really need to be told these things? 

"our homes need to be saturated with God."

am i crazy to think my kids won't watch tv before their two? no, i'm not. but. i'm going to do everything i can to not let that tv become a constant babysitter. because there's no way letting a child watch tv every day for long periods of time is having them saturated in God. 

i'm going to monitor what my kids watch. and yes. even disney channel shows. i'm going to monitor the time they spend in front of the tv. i'm going to make sure that tv is never the first thing they want to do. 

because i want my house saturated with God. 

because satan will be knocking at my front door. 

i honestly can not wait to be a mommy. i can't wait to raise up this child (and their siblings) to know God. 

i can't wait to raise up my little world changers. 

*all quotes from the sermon*

http://churchintheson.com/series/mothers-day/

week eighteen & nineteen

 

*i'm combining these two weeks because they were pretty much the same*

mommy is feeling: really great! that pregnancy glow has really hit and i'm feeling so great! 

weight gain: i'm going to say 5 here, because again, i'm not keeping track but i have notice the scale going up

food cravings: mexican food. all day errr day. 

food aversions: salsa out of a jar, and bbq. still. and chipotle. i'm so sorry to admit this. 

maternity clothes: maternity jeans have been purchased. the belly band and i broke up. 

movement: I FELT A KICK! i instantly cried my eyes out at the amazement. i was just watching tv and could feel them in there moving and then boom! a little poke on my finger. God is so amazing and i am over the moon. 

emotions: they've been in check lately. other than just crying at little things like baby commercials and the norm. 

sleep: my hips have started to hurt at night when i'm sleeping, which makes me feel like an old woman. but a pillow between my legs helps so much. i wake up and move a lot...and to use the restroom. at least twice. 

favorite moment of the week: feeling that first kick. i still just can't even. 

things i'm praying about: for this child to grow up and know Jesus. 

looking forward to: our 20 week ultra sound! 

a 20 week letter

dear baby,

you're currently kicking mommy, which i can't even begin to tell you how much i love.
but here we are at 20 weeks.
half way to meeting you in person.

today we got to see you up close and personal, and i know i'm really biased here. but. you're already the cutest baby alive. we saw your hands and feet up close, and you even flexed those arms for the camera. i think you've got a steiner nose...but i'm not sure where you're getting those luscious lips from. but i can't wait to kiss them. i think you already have your daddy's big feet. you're above average in size, which i'm proud of. and also not surprised considering who your daddy is.

we're completely smitten with you already.

i've waited for this bench mark week to get here for quite sometime. you see, aunt minda is getting married this week, and i get to see some very wonderful friends, and being half way through this pregnancy has just got me all emotional.

but you'll learn that about your mommy.
i tend to be a bit of an emotional person.

i've been counting down the weeks to see you today. because last time we saw you, well it was hard to see even you. you were still this little...blob. please don't take it personal. it's the truth.
but today. today we got to see all of you.
well not all of you. we're keeping some parts of you a surprise.

i have to be honest and tell you that mommy was a little nervous about today. it's basically been the first time we could see and make sure that everything was growing and developing just as it should. it's not that i didn't think it would be...but i'm human. i did know though that no matter what. the Creator of the Universe, the God Who placed the stars in the sky, has created you with the same beauty. every single part of you was put into being on purpose.
i'm going to tell you that all the time, so get used to it.
i trust that God has made you perfect in His image. which you already are.

i still just can't believe that i'm halfway through this pregnancy.
it's been a little bit of a tough road so far. but you're worth every second i didn't feel well.
we're pretty much on the second leg of the tour here. i have a feeling the next twenty weeks are going to fly by, and i honestly hope they do.

because little one, i can't wait to meet you.

i love you more than you'll ever know,
mommy

week sixteen & seventeen

mommy is feeling: other than the mornings, i'm back to normal...minus still being pretty sleepy. but i am so thankful for that

weight gain: i've done a terrible job at keeping track of this. but i think a pound or two

food cravings: mexican food and french fries

food aversions: still on the salsa thing. i know. it's weird. also adding bbq to the list. i'm not sure where this one came from either but just typing it makes my stomach turn

maternity clothes: maternity shorts! as seen in the photo above. it's already summer time in florida and the belly band just isn't working with shorts anymore. 

movement: flutter city!! i felt the first little flutter at a wedding i was shooting and immediately ran to call sonny. it was the most amazing feeling in the world. if i could try and describe it, i'd say it's like someone trying to tickle you...from the inside. 

emotions: i cry all the time at everything. just the thought of somethings make me cry. holy preggo emotions.

sleep: getting a little tough. not super comfy all night long, but getting lots of rest. 

favorite moment of the week: feeling that little monkey move around! i can't even begin to describe how amazing it was. 

things i'm praying about: for this child to grow up and know Jesus, like really know Jesus and love Him.

looking forward to: an actual kick! 

(the cutest big brother)

mommy is feeling: same as last week, which is good! 

weight gain: at the doctors office i gained 3 pounds since our last visit

food cravings: still loving mexican food. and apples. or apple juice which ever, i want it. 

food aversions: salsa out of a jar, and bbq. 

maternity clothes: just maternity shorts, but thinking about some maternity jeans. the belly band is great but it's getting a bit tight with my jeans. 

movement: still moving around and tickling mommy! it happens mostly at night (which i've heard happens) but no matter when it is, i love every second of it. i'll stop mid sentance to anyone near me when they move around in there just to say "the baby is moving!" 

emotions: all of them. 

sleep: my hips have started to hurt at night when i'm sleeping, which makes me feel like an old woman. but a pillow between my legs helps so much. 

favorite moment of the week: still all the movement. it's so amazing. 

things i'm praying about: the next five months to go by quickly but intentionally. 

looking forward to: a real kick! 

week fourteen & fifteen

mommy is feeling: much better, hallelujah amen than ya Jesus. still waking up feeling pretty nauseous but i take a zofran and i'm good to go. 

weight gain: none, i lost some. since the doctors appointment i got down to 138 from 145. not on purpose. and i'm not sure how because i eat french fries. a lot. 

food cravings: i was with my big sister and she was on the phone with her hubs and they mentioned eating at buffalo wild wings and the minute she said it my mouth started salivating. i went. i got wings. it was delicious. 

food aversions: still on the salsa thing. i know. it's weird. 

maternity clothes: nothing yet, still just that good old belly band! 

movement: nugget is in there moving around but i can't feel anything yet. oh goodness, that i can't wait for. 

emotions: not only am i pregnant, but i hosted a bridal shower for my baby sister. so yea, there was all the emotions going on this week. 

sleep: finally feeling like i'm catching that second wind!  

favorite moment of the week: seeing reagan and her first response to me was, "wow aunt meggy, your belly is big!"

things i'm praying about: there are some big things coming up for us that we need to get/purchase for our little growing family. 

looking forward to: seeing this belly grow! 

fact. i picked that orange out of my backyard. 

mommy is feeling: still really good! 

weight gain: up 2 pounds! 

food cravings: apples. all the apples i can get. 

food aversions: salsa. ew.

maternity clothes: still rocking that belly band. and a lot of stretchy pants. and this dress! 

movement: nugget is in there moving around but i can't feel anything yet. oh goodness, that i can't wait for. 

emotions: i cry and the dumbest things. happy things, sad things. all the things make me cry. 

sleep: i'm moving around a lot at night which wakes me up. and this week i've been so exhausted.  

favorite moment of the week: shooting my first wedding pregnant. my bride was amazing, and knew i was pregnant and kept asking how i was. seriously the sweetest. 

things i'm praying about: that first movement to be felt! 

looking forward to: our doctors appointment in week 17!

how i barely made it through my first trimester

dear women who are pregnant and don't have morning sickness, or women who have given birth and not experienced morning sickness:

you make me sick.
i hate your stinking guts.

love,
megan and all other sick mommas

(if you've never seen little rascals this joke is totally lost, and now you think i'm just a mean lady.)

here's the truth about the first trimester of pregnancy.
it's hard.
really, really hard.

morning sickness is no joke, and you feel like no matter how many hours of sleep you've had, it's never enough.

there's also no real end date to these wonderful feelings.
so beware.
just because you're in your second trimester does not mean you'll automatically feel better once that magic week 13 gets here.

but.
you can do this.
if i did it, anyone can do it.

here are some tips on how i (seriously) barely made it through my first trimester.

#1. zofran
tell your doctor you're sick and they (should) give you this magical pill, or one like it. it seriously saved me. i honestly have no idea what women did back in the olden days without this stuff. there were a couple side effects (constipation and headaches) but it was the most even trade off. this didn't make me feel 100% better, but it did help the constant nausea and i was able to eat very small meals.

#2. frozen breakfast foods/ all the bad cereal
eggo waffles, toaster studels, fruit loops, frosted flakes, and lucky charms. i'm not sure what it was about them but it got me through most days. there were also a lot of days where all i could get down was one eggo waffle, or a bowl of cereal. maybe it's because they were bland? i hear that helps, bland food.

#3. netflix
honestly, i watched more netflix in those weeks than what i thought was humanly possible. i won't tell you how quickly i made it through friends, and then the office. but. i will tell you that being able to put something on the tv that made me laugh helped.

#4. eating what i wanted, when i wanted it
on the days that i actually felt like eating a meal, i didn't hold back on what it was. mcdonalds burger and some fries? you betcha. grits for dinner? i'm telling you. when you do have a craving for something, give into it. because when you're sick, there's no telling when you might eat a whole meal again. this isn't to say that everything will be welcomed by your new roomie, because although you were salivating for those scallops, someone else was ready to kick them out as quickly as you put them in your belly.

#5. ginger ale and club crackers (on occasion)
to be honest, i don't think the ginger ale helped at all, but the bubbles did. and i suggest club crackers because saltines are terrible. no one should ever have to eat those. ever.
and one thing i did hear over and over again that helped a bit was keeping crackers on your night stand, because you will wake up in the middle of the night starving. it also seemed to help to eat right when i woke up in the morning (it still does. i waste no time getting some food into my stomach). some mornings i would eat a cracker before i even got out of bed.
and defiantly eat something before you drink anything, no matter how thirsty you might be.

and so that's about it.

seriously.

i tried to tell you that it sucks. and i honestly don't think there's really anything that makes morning sickness go away. there are just somethings you can do to curb the terribleness. now. these are things that helped for me, and no pregnancy is the same. so some of this might work for you and it might not. you'll figure out quickly what works and what doesn't.
but keep that chin up (when it isn't in the toilet)! because better times are on the horizon my dear!

it might take you to week 15 or 16 to get there, but it's worth the wait!

the big "oh my gosh" moment

i think it's safe to say that no matter if you're trying or not, seeing those two little pink lines (or a plus sign, or a face smiling at you) is a serious shock.

there's actually a human life forming inside of you.

sonny and i had decided to start trying around thanksgiving, keeping it pretty quiet. because hello, that's a lot of pressure and we also knew that just because we had started trying didn't mean that this was the timing the Lord had as well.

turns out He did.

i had been tracking my cycle with an app that also let me know when i was "green and ready to go". that same month i saw those two pink lines.

lesson to be learned here kids.
when you start to try, you better be ready for the outcome. cause it might happen really quickly.

sonny and i took a trip to the big apple this past christmas and it was honestly the best trip of my life. little did we know, we weren't the only two westmoreland's on that trip. our little bean was starting to cook away. now there's part of me that's glad i wasn't aware yet because i had the best beef carpaccio and wine ever. two things on the "do not eat list" once you find out you're preggo.

we came home the week before christmas and my birthday and it all just rushed by. before i knew it, it was the night before christmas eve.
we had been out running around all day, because we were exchanging gifts between the two of us that night. what i had failed to realize during the day was that aunt flow hadn't showed up yet. but had been like clockwork on that exact day the last year almost.
so when we got home, before we opened up presents, i had a "what the heck" moment and took that little stick into the bathroom.

less than 30 seconds later the first line comes through and then...that very faint second line came poking through.

my first response: h o l y c r a p.

my second response: holycrap.

my third response: HOLY CRAP.

tears immediately filled my eyes and after the holy craps i looked up and said "thank you."
because let's face it. without Him, i've got nothin.

meanwhile, sonny had already set up camp in the living room and had been patiently waiting to open presents.

i had decided a long time ago that i wanted to tell sonny in a really cute way. most morning i make him coffee so i had envisioned a cup that said "worlds best daddy" and letting him fill in the rest.
in the heat of the moment, that all went out the window. because there wasn't a chance i was going to wait until the morning to tell him the news. i honestly would have burst.

i quickly ran to the kitchen, grabbed a white mug and ran back to our room yelling, "I'll be right there, finishing a gift!"

it's honestly the worst hand writing in the world. and i'm not sure why i needed to include the mug anyways, but whateves. i went with it and stuck to my mug idea.

i took the mug and slid it into his stocking without him noticing and waited patiently as we opened our gifts from each other.

which only took about 10 minutes but felt like 10 hours.

then i told him santa left something in his stocking.
he reached inside and pulled out the mug looking at the writing and paying no attention to what was inside.
because it said "daddy" on it, he thought it was from the dog.
seriously.
and it's a logical thought because we're totally those people.

after a second i told him to "look at it".
i'm a bonehead and was taking a video but at this moment stopped because i was just so focused on him and also my hands were kind of shaking.
but i did catch this reaction.

(which he says was just his reaction to the dog mug but i think he figured it out pretty quick)

i can't remember exactly the words exchanged after that but lots of, "I'm pregnant!" and "I love you" and "oh my gosh this is really happening!"
ok there was a lot of "oh my gosh this is really happening"s.

because it really was. parents. me and this guy.

our first order of business was of course to run to cvs to get more tests to confirm the little nugget.
which was a very expensive endeavor for such items because i decided to buy two of the most expensive ones that tell you how far along you are. when we got home i decided to try and be smarter than the tests by peeing into a cup and putting them all in there at once. i of course did it wrong (because yea, there's a wrong way to do this) and they all came back negative or nothing at all. so back to the store i went, bought the cheaper ones and finally saw all the little lines i needed to.

to say it was our best christmas yet would be an understatement.

there's still days i can't believe it. but of course look down at the kangaroo pouch i've got and believe it. God is good. and when you pray for a child, He hears you.